Does anyone have an extra dictionary handy? Apparently French Prime Minister Dominique de Villepin could use one... In an interview with CNN yesterday, Villepin stated that there have been no "riots" in France! "I'm not sure you can call them riots," the Prime Minister said... "In France during the two-week period of unrest, nobody died... So I think you can't compare this social unrest with any kind of riots..."

(Really? Over 9,000 cars get burned, more than 100 public buildings get torched, rocks and other items get thrown at police, the streets are in the hands of the mob every night for weeks, and these were not riots?!?)

"There were no guns in the streets," Villepin went on to say... "No adults; mostly young people between 12 and 20... so it's a very special movement..."

(Ah, I see, only adults can riot... Or does that mean riots need parental supervision, perhaps? Maybe we should write the whole thing off to kids playing with matches...)

(From Merriam-Webster: Riot (noun) - (1) unrestrained revelry; noise, uproar, or disturbance made by revelers (2) public violence, tumult, or disorder: a violent public disorder; specifically : a tumultuous disturbance of the public peace by three or more persons assembled together and acting with a common intent)

If you ever thought alimony was something you could afford, consider this: an Iranian man is going to spend the next 10,000+ years paying alimony to his ex-wife! It all started when he got married... In Iran, couples must sign a pre-marital agreement where the bride stipulate the level of compensation they can demand during the marriage or in the event of separation and divorce... In this case, the woman asked for $15 million in gold coins! Now they are getting divorced... Naturally, the man does not have the gold on hand, so the court ordered him to pay the coins in single monthly installments... Which means he'll finally be done in 10,333 years!

Losing weight is always difficult - even more so around the holidays... For that matter, just maintaining your weight is difficult around the holidays... Well, here's something that will help keep the pounds away: the fatter you are, the bigger the needles are going to be!

Researchers at the Adelaide and Meath Hospital in Dublin, Ireland, performed a study on intramuscular injections of drugs and antibiotics... Two-thirds of the patients studied did not receive the full dose of the injection... In fact, only 8% of women and less than 32% of men were successfully injected! Instead, the injected fluid lodged in the fat tissue of their buttocks... "There is no question that obesity is the underlying cause," researcher Dr. Victoria Chan said... "The amount of fat tissue overlying the muscles exceeds the length of the needles commonly used for these injections." Far from a minor issue, medications that remain lodged in fat can cause infection or irritation... Dr. Chan says longer needles may be needed...

Not everyone agrees, however... Professor Richard Guy, an expert in pharmaceutical sciences at Bath University, said, "Whether using longer needles is a practical solution, I'm not sure, as these are unlikely to be terribly popular..."

(Yeah, the propect of a doctor walking toward me with a 4 inch needle is enough to keep me thin!)

Police in Baltimore, Maryland, are completely in the dark... Someone is stealing light poles, and they do not know who... And these are not small light poles - these are the 30-foot, 250-pound, aluminum light poles found next to streets all over the city! Sometimes the thieves even dress up as utility crews, place orange traffic cones around the poles they are about to take down, and steal the pole as traffic drives by... The only possible motive the police have so far is that perhaps they are being sold as scrap metal, but the $75-$87.5 per pole the thieves would get is a far cry from the $750 the city pays for each one... And while local salvage yards have not reported any poles, some salvagers are not suprised at the crime... "They steal everything here in Baltimore," said Lynn Smith, manager at Modern Junk & Salvage Co... "Nothing's too kooky to me anymore..."

Snowy, icy roads always make for interesting driving... Salting them helps, but it ruins the cars... So try Molasses! Grain Processing Corp, in Muscatine, Iowa, has introduced Geomelt - a de-icing product made from sugar beet-based molasses... Not only is it organic, it is non-corrosive so it will not hurt cars, the roads, or the environment... "You could drink it if you wanted to," said enthusiastic Geomelt distributor Galen Kauzlarich, "but I imagine it would leave a pretty terrible taste in your mouth." and while people need to get used to the brown color, "it’s going to make bridges last longer, roadways last longer, state and city equipment last longer, and it’s moved all the way to Canada... They’re using it..."

And as an added benefit, the old phrase about being "as slow as molasses in January" is actually a positive thing when attempting to drive on icy roads!

(I just wonder how they keep the wildlife from thinking of treated roads as one big molasses dessert!)

The Cabaret Club in Kienberg, Switzerland, prided itself on its attention to safety... In fact, owner Benedict Frank was quite vocal about how fireproof the club was... So when he was visited by safety inspectors who questioned whether his paper ornament decorations were in keeping with fire safety rules, he decided to set one on fire just to show them how safe the club was... Instead, the fire spread quickly through the club and burned both it and the neighboring restaurant to the ground!

(Oops!)

Looking for a conversation starter for those Holiday gatherings? Try one of these little known facts:

• A dime has 118 ridges around the edge
• A cat has 32 muscles in each ear
• A crocodile cannot stick out its tongue
• A dragonfly has a life span of 24 hours
• A goldfish has a memory span of three seconds
• A "jiffy" is an actual unit of time for 1/100th of a second
• A shark is the only fish that can blink with both eyes
• A snail can sleep for three years
• Al Capone's business card said he was a used furniture dealer
• All 50 states are listed across the top of the Lincoln Memorial on the back of the $5 bill
• Almonds are a member of the peach family
• An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain

• Babies are born without kneecaps... They don't appear until the child reaches 2 to 6 years of age
• Butterflies taste with their feet
• Cats have over one hundred vocal sounds. Dogs only have about 10
• "Dreamt" is the only English word that ends in the letters "mt"
• February 1865 is the only month in recorded history not to have a full moon
• In the last 4,000 years, no new animals have been domesticated
• If the population of China walked past you, in single file, the line would never end because of the rate of reproduction
• If you are an average American, in your whole life, you will spend an average of 6 months waiting at red lights
• It's impossible to sneeze with your eyes open
• Leonardo Da Vinci invented the scissors
• Maine is the only state whose name is just one syllable
• No word in the English language rhymes with month, orange, silver, or purple
• On a Canadian two dollar bill, the flag flying over the Parliament building is an American flag
• Our eyes are always the same size from birth, but our nose and ears never stop growing
• Peanuts are one of the ingredients of dynamite
• Rubber bands last longer when refrigerated
• Stewardesses" is the longest word typed with only the left hand and "lollipop" with your right
• The average person's left hand does 56% of the typing
• The cruise liner, QE2, moves only six inches for each gallon of diesel that it burns
• The microwave was invented after a researcher walked by a radar tube and a chocolate bar melted in his pocket
• The sentence: "The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog" uses every letter of the alphabet
• The winter of 1932 was so cold that Niagara Falls froze completely solid
• The words 'racecar,' 'kayak' and 'level' are the same whether they are read left to right or right to left (palindromes)
• There are 293 ways to make change for a dollar
• There are more chickens than people in the world
• There are only four words in the English language which end in "dous": tremendous, horrendous, stupendous, and hazardous
• There are two words in the English language that have all five vowels in order: "abstemious" and "facetious"
• There's no Betty Rubble in the Flintstones Chewables Vitamins
• Tigers have striped skin, not just striped fur
• Typewriter is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on one row of the keyboard
• Winston Churchill was born in a ladies' room during a dance
• Women blink nearly twice as much as men
• Your stomach has to produce a new layer of mucus every two weeks;otherwise it will digest itself

I guess you could say Sandrine Helene Sellies of France as a problem... She was flying from Hong Kong to Brisbane, Australia, on a Cathay Pacific airliner... Being afraid of flying, she had "prepared" herself with a combination of sleeping tablets and alcohol just before the flight... The brew apparently relaxed her inhibitions, because she decided she really needed a cigarette... So she grabbed a cigarette and a lighter and headed for the door... While the plane was in the air! Luckily, a flight attendant saw her tampering with the emergency exit and stopped her before anything more serious could happen... And while she pleaded guilty to endangering the safety of an aircraft at Brisbane Magistrates Court, she claimed she did not remember the incident and had a history of sleepwalking... The court let her off with an AUS $1,000 ($734 US) Good Behavior Bond...

I finally got the answer to that burning question: Why are Grape Nuts called Grape Nuts when it's neither Grape nor nuts?

So direct from the website:

Dr. Phil McGraw has won legions of fans for his TV show with his homey, laid-back style and tough-love techniques... Now it appears he has one more: the CIA! In fact, they admire his style so much they want to hire him as a consultant! "Watch his show," said a top CIA official. "He seems so homey and touchy-feely until it gets down to the nittygritty. His lectures to his guests are ball-breakers, and he always ends with, 'so what's it gonna be?' and they give it up. Instantly."

And with all the recent problems arising out of current interrogation techniques, this is nothing to laugh about... "Our reputation has suffered some damage lately, there's no doubt," the official said... Hiring everybody's buddy as a top consultant could help that, but the real goal is to find out how he pulls all that information from people, in front of a live audience, and broadcasts to millions... He gets them to admit things I wouldn't say out loud if I was all alone in my bathroom..."

"We think he could teach us how to suck them in with that sly 'How's that working for you?' grin... The detainees aren't tough enough to withstand that, followed by the blow to their psychological security when he launches into a tirade when he gets less than the truth... The unrelenting lecture, the flailing arms, leaning in real close to the subject with his fist on his knee, that abrupt switch will break them... That's the key..."

(Think of the possibilities... Not only would people arrested for terrorist acts tell the government everything, they'd leave happier, more well-adjusted people than before!)

Nou Chang, a 52-year-old Minneapolis grocery-store owner, was approached by a young man who claimed to have a potion that turned white paper into U.S. currency. Franklin Forlemu allegedly came to Chang's store, placed slips of blank white paper between some $20 bills, then slipped on a breathing mask and poured his special potion over the money. It appeared to the grocer that the plain paper had turned into $20 bills.

Forlemu offered to help Chang change more money, and the grocer provided him with $70,000 in $100 bills. According to a report in the Minneapolis Star-Tribune, "He watched Forlemu put the blank slips between them and pour the solution on the stack, then wrap the wad in tinfoil and pour on more. Forlemu said the money and paper must be sealed for three hours before opening the windfall. But when Chang finally unwrapped the tinfoil stack, he found nothing but white paper."

Chang called police, who arrested Forlemu and found $76,000 in $100 bills hidden in the apartment. According to police, the "mystery potion" was water, and Forlemu used "sleight-of-hand to make it look like the paper slips turned into cash."

Bryan Lindberg, an Anoka County prosecutor for 20 years, said the scam "is the most creative one I have seen."

One more foolish action took place in connection with the scam: Formelu, an illegal immigrant from Africa, was released on personal recognizance.

Doctor tells you your weight would be perfect for a man 17 feet tall.
You are responsible for a slight but measurable shift in the earth's axis.
Paramedics bring in the Jaws of Life to pry you out of the EZ-Boy.
The potatoes you used set off another famine in Ireland.
You receive a Sumo Wrestler application in your e-mail.
You set off 3 earthquake seismographs on your morning jog Friday.
Pricking your finger for cholesterol screening only yielded gravy.
That rash on your stomach turns out to be steering wheel burn.
Your wife wears a life jacket at night in your waterbed.
Representatives from the Butterball Hall of Fame called twice.
Your arms are too short to reach the keyboard and delete this.

It all started with a caller to a radio talk show in Sydney, Australia... The pork chops in his freezer were glowing! And then others noticed the same thing! Were the pork chops radioactive? Nope... According to George Davey of the New South Wales Food Authority, while people would naturally be "shocked" to see their meat glowing, the effect is actually caused by the harmless pseudomonas fluorescens bacteria... He said the bacteria is normally present on meat and seafood at low levels but proper cooking kills it... "It is important to remember that the microorganism responsible for the glow is not known to cause food poisoning," he said, adding that bacteria does grow quickly if food is not stored at the correct temperature or is beginning to spoil... His advice? "Simply discard any food that glows..."

Seems like everyone has one of those GPS navigation systems these days... And they all have that Plain Jane "Turn Left" (before you fall asleep) voice to give you directions... Well, Mr. T doesn't approve! In fact, Mr. T is just one of several celebrities working with Navtones producer Wanderlust Media to make dirrections more exciting! "Pay attention to what I’m saying," he'll say, "Mr. T gonna get you there in one piece … you gonna be there safely, or else!"

"The idea behind this came when we heard anecdotally that a lot of people were frustrated with the voices on their navigation systems and talked back to them," Wanderlust CEO Will Andre said... "That led to some research and we found that a lot of users referred to their navigation systems by a specific name, like Jane, so we decided to capitalize on that relationship..." They've already got Mr. T, Burt Reynolds, Dennis Hopper, John Cleese, and more! Each one will be available for download to navigation devices for about $10 beginning later this year... Plus, there will be character-themed voices (like a surfer dude, or a cowboy) available for only $5! The plan, Andre says, is to make personalized GPS systems as popular as custom ringtones for cell phones...

(I just hope they don't come out with the "Annoying Back Seat Driver" Navtone!)

Moms since the dawn of time have been telling their kids to dress warm in Winter or they'll catch a cold... Turns out they were right! Scientists at the Common Cold Centre in Cardiff, Wales, have found that getting your feet cold and wet can triple the risk of developing cold symptoms such as sore throat, sneezing and coughing. In fact, a third of all participants in the study developed colds within 5 days of getting their feet dunked in cold water! "Mothers can now be confident in their advice to children to wrap up well in winter," Professor Ron Eccles said... "We have reports going back hundreds of years where people knew if they got soaking wet they were more likely to develop a cold, so it passed into folklore for good reason..."

(So listen to your Mom this winter!)

Remember being told by your dentist (and your Mom) that you need to brush your teeth three times a day? Do you still do it? If you think it's tough for you, think about soldiers in a combat zone or on duty where taking the time to find your brush, toothpaste, and the time the use them is no small feat... Which is why the U.S. Army is working on something new: Combat gum!

Combat gum would contain a special bacteria-fighting agent to prevent plaque, cavities and gum disease... Basically, it would replace the need to brush... Plus, since the Army already issues gum to soldiers in their field rations, it's a natural fit...

Dr. Patrick DeLuca of the University of Kentucky is already working with the prototype, trying to make it taste better and ensure that it retains its flavor and bacteria-fighting ability for 30 minutes to an hour... The Army has already started talking to companies like Wrigley to help manufacture and distribute it...

I am writing this instead of doing the dishes... I hate doing the dishes... I don't like washing and I don't like drying... Which makes cooking decent meals (not from a single box) for the whole family somewhat problematic as the "cook a good meal" side of me wars agains the "I don't want to wash all of this" side...

Which is where one pot meals come in handy... We're not talking crock pots here (although those are also good) or restricting dinner to soup - we're talking one single pot used to cook the entire dinner! And the food isn't lacking for the lack of crockery! Plus, there are lots of resources available:

• EarthEasy.com not only has a quick primer on how to cook one pot meals in general, it also has recipes for Rice Verde, Skillet Sausage Paella, Herbed Cod, Summer Vegetable Medley, Skillet Taco Supremo, and more!
• Waitrose Food Illustrated has further pointers on making your own dishes and recipes for Chicken with Tarragon, Roasted Tomato and Butternut Squash Risotto, Rich Beef Stew with Parsley Dumplings, and more!
• ScoutXing.com has a mix-and-match approach for creating meals including Rice N’ Chicken, Turkey Vulture Casserole, Halfa Super, and more!
• FindArticles.com has an archive from Men's Fitness magazine including quick and easy recipes for Santa Fe Chiken with Black Beans and Rice. Turkey Chili, Shrimp-and-Couscous Curry, and Madarin Chicken!
• Recipezaar has lots of recipes (as this search shows) such as Shrimp Alfredo, Overnight One-Pot Cheesecake, Clam Bake, Moroccan Lamb, Southwestern Chicken Casserole, and more!

What do you do if someone runs for office and is unopposed? Do you still vote for them? Not vote at all? No way! You vote for a write-in candidate! And that is where things get interesting... Take, for example, the election results in Guilford County, North Carolina:

So how many votes did imaginary people, famous people, dead people and others receive?

Greensboro Mayor (incumbent Keith Holliday ran unopposed)

• Anybody Else/But - 17
• Mickey Mouse - 10
• John Doe - 4
• Me - 4
• Donald Duck - 3
• No One - 3
• A - 2
• I - 2
• None of the Above - 2
• AA - 1
• Any body Else No Keith Holliday - 1
• Anyone to Stop Giveaways - 1
• Barrbbos - 1
• Joe Blow - 1
• Bozo the Clown - 1
• Hillary Clinton - 1
• Cowboy - 1
• Daffy Duck - 1
• Electro - 1
• II Hammer - 1
• Hmmr - 1
• J - 1
• JL - 1
• Jams HR - 1
• Jughead - 1
• Kilroy - 1
• Rush Limbaugh - 1
• Markelmore - 1
• Metallgo - 1
• Mr Sun - 1
• Natty Greene - 1
• Richard Nixon - 1
• Not Keith Holliday - 1
• NY Madona - 1
• Other - 1
• Priest - 1
• Christopher Reeves - 1
• Saint Dennis - 1
• Snoopy - 1
• Tony Stewart - 1
• Sweetums - 1
• TCPEPE - 1
• Desmond Tutu - 1
• Yoda - 1

• Anybody Else/Anybody - 5
• John Doe - 2
• Bad - 1
• Jed Clampett - 1
• Cow Pattie - 1
• Kilroy - 1
• Mickey Mouse - 1
• No - 1
• None of the Above - 1
• Oscar the Grouch - 1
• Pedro - 1
• Rhino Guy - 1
• Someone Else - 1
• Frank Zappa - 1

• The Number 2 - 5
• The Number 4 - 1
• Big Crook - 1
• Space Cadet - 1
• Daffy Duck - 1
• Rufus Dufus - 1
• Falls - 1
• General Zod - 1
• Gonzo - 1
• Hammer - 1
• None - 1
• Red - 1
• Skip Slumlord - 1
• Small - 1

• Any 1 Else - 5
• Any 2 Else - 1
• B3 - 1
• Donald Duck - 1
• Daffy Duck - 1
• Duck D - 1
• Mickey Mouse - 1
• Minnie Mouse - 1
• RayRay - 1
• Underoath - 1

There is one gray, long-hair calico cat in Wenatchee, Washington, that is really glad to have 9 lives... Witnesses say it leaped or fell out of a moving pickup truck that was driving across a bridge over the Columbia River... Then it ran through busy traffic to get to the middle of the bridge... When Humane Society officials attempted to catch it it leaped over a railing and fell 70 feet (21.3 meters) into the river... Finally, it managed to swim 600 feet (183 meters) through the cold water to make it to shore!

Officials at the Wenatchee Valley Humane Society say the cat "ate ravenously" after its ordeal...

(Worse still, the cat has no collar... So after all that it is still stuck in the kennel because no one knows who the owner is!)

Most people go to garage sales looking to spend a dollar or two and get a good deal on something... Every once and a while, though, there are garage sales that are a bit different... Take the one currently going on in Chelsea's Egerton Terrace (London, England)... What's for sale? The garage! And the price isn't cheap: the 20ft by 9ft garage is going for £300,000 (about $521,000 dollars)! "Freehold garages are rare," Patrick Aschan, of Cluttons estate agency said... "Parking can be tricky and if you have a nice toy then some people inevitably want to put it in a garage."

(That's got to be some toy if the toy box costs that much!)

For hundreds of years, people on ships in the Indian Ocean have told stories of nighttime voyages through eerie stretches of water where the ocean glowed... Glowed so brightly sailors could read books by its light! But until now, that's all its been - stories of "milky seas"... By the time a science ship could get there, the glow would be gone with no way to verify it...

Now, scientists at the Naval Research Laboratory's Marine Meteorology Division have something better: Satellite pictures! The scientists had been researching the oceanic glow in ships' logs and comparing the location and time frame to archived data from the Defense Meteorological Satellite Program (DMSP) ... A British merchant vessel, the S.S. Lima, was crossing the northwestern Indian Ocean approximately 280 km off the Somali coast on the night of January 25, 1995, when it encountered a glowing sea... Enhanced satellite imagery collected roughly 30 minutes after the ship's report of initial sighting revealed a massive region of low-level light emission! In fact, the glowing waters spanned an area almost the size of the state of Connecticut - over 15,000 square kilometers (about 5,790 square miles)! In fact, the boundaries matched closely with the ship's entry and exit of the brightly glowing waters. And it lasted at least 3 nights!

Now that they know they can document it, scientists are looking for more satellite images and perhaps a realtime feed so they can determine exactly what is causing the glow... Although known light-emitting organisms are not capable (as far as anyone knows) of creating the effect, these "milky seas" are hypothesized to be a strong bioluminescence produced by colonies of bacteria associated with a microalgal bloom...

Airplanes in the sky... Certainly nothing artistic about that, right? Then again, maybe there is! Scott Hessels and Gabriel Dunne think so, at least... They take raw data from the U.S. Federal Aviation Administration (FAA) and run it through a series of graphics programs... The result? Some pretty impressive little movies that visually show air traffic patterns across the United States... Check them out!

Sometimes you don't even know you've been waiting to ask the question until you see the answer... Here are some good examples...

Why are pineapples so spiny?
The prickly exterior of a pineapple seems to make the propagation of seeds a might difficult... Until you realize how impatient people can be... Pineapples in stores are actually very far from ripe! Forest-dwelling creatures eat pineapples after they have ripened, fallen to the ground, and lain there a few days - all of which makes the pineapple quite mushy rather than prickly...

Just how big is a molehill?
The molehill is create by the mole excavating underground tunnels... Moles eat worms and bugs that enter its tunnels, so the size of a mole network depends on the supply of food... Adult moles can excavate tunnels over 75,000 square feet (almost 7,00 square meters) and up to 6 levels deep! that's a pretty big molehill!



Does wearing black make you look smaller?
Yes! The human eye can only perceive shapes if the object appears in different shades or colors... Dark clothes and colors hide wrinkles, curves, and relative size better than light ones...

Does beheading hurt?
Yes! A medical study in 1983 concluded that no matter how efficient the method of execution, a few seconds of pain is inevitable when losing one's head... The guillotine, considered one of the more "humane" methods, relies on severing the brain and spinal cord after cutting the surrounding tissues... Even so, at least two to three seconds of intense pain cannot be avoided! (There are actual accounts all through history of people continuing to show movement long after the decapitation)

How many species live on or in the human body?
About 200 - including 80 in the mouth alone! And that's nothing compared to the 10 million organisms occupying ever square centimeter of your skin... Plus the trillions of microbes living in your bowel to help with digestion!

How fat would you need to be to be bulletproof?
Way too fat! The most common type used in a hand gun is a 9mm, which generally can go through 24 inches (about 61 centimeters) of human flesh before stopping... Plus, the bullet will cause one cubic centimeter of damage to the surrounding tissue for every centimeter... And that does not count bones and internal organs... So your only chance is to be very, very, very fat...

You know you live in Florida (or along the Gulf coast) if...

• You have FEMA's number on your speed dial
• You have more than 300 "C" and "D" batteries in your kitchen drawer
• You are thinking of repainting your house to match the plywood covering your windows
• Your Social Security Number isn't a secret - it's written in Sharpie on your arms
• You are on a first-name basis with the cashier at Home Depot
• The road leading to your house has been declared a "No-Wake" Zone
• You decide that your patio furniture looks better on the bottom of the pool
• You can wish that other people get hit by a hurricane and not feel the least bit guilty about it
• You have 2-liter coke bottles and milk jugs filled with water in your freezer
• Three months ago you couldn't hang a shower curtain; today you can assemble a portable generator by candlelight
• You catch a 13-pound redfish... In your driveway
• You can recite from memory whole portions of your homeowner's insurance policy
• At cocktail parties, women are attracted to the guy with the biggest chainsaw
• There is a roll of tar paper in your garage
• You can rattle off the names of three or more meteorologists who work at the Weather Channel
• Someone comes to your door to tell you they found your roof
• Ice is a valid topic of conversation before Winter
• Relocating to South Dakota does not seem like such a crazy idea
• You spend more time on your roof then in your living room
• You've been laughed at over the phone by a roofer, fence builder, or a tree worker
• Having a tree in your living room does not necessarily mean it's Christmas
• You know the difference between the "good side" of a storm and the "bad side"
• You go to work early and stay late just to enjoy the air conditioning
• A battery powered TV is considered a home entertainment center
• A chain saw, generator or a gas grill comes as a free gift with every new mortgage

Take the prospective employees you are trying to place and put them in a room with only a table and two chairs. Leave them alone for two hours, without any instruction. At the end of that time, go back and see what they are doing.

• If they have taken the table apart, put them in Engineering.
• If they are counting the ceiling tiles, assign them to Finance.
• If they are waving their arms and talking out loud, send them to Consulting.
• If they are talking to the chairs, Personnel is a good spot for them.
• If they are wearing green sunglasses and need a haircut, Computer Information Systems is their niche.
• If they mention what a good price we got for the table and chairs, put them into Purchasing.
• If they mention that hardwood furniture DOES NOT come from rain forests, Public Relations would suit them well.
• If they are writing up the experience, send them to the Technical Documents team.
• If they don't even look up when you enter the room, assign them to Security.
• If they try to tell you it's not as bad as it looks, send them to Marketing.
• If they are sleeping, they are Management material.